This quiet, lonely piece of cyber space hasn’t been used much for funnily enough about a year. Life has been somewhat quieter, both literally and metaphorically since returning from Cambodia. Their wedding season is not missed. We’ve settled back into routine life with school drop offs, footy boots, work and carving out adult weekend time that doesn’t involve AFL matches or kids parties. A messy juggle with a good dose of moronic clown laughter..to keep us sane and possibly reinforce our unhinged selves.
This past year has been about sifting through rugged relationship terrain and doing primary research- falling hopelessly at times to ultimately find myself again. Tim and I separated after returning from Cambodia. Is this an advertisement for jumping into family sabbaticals in developing countries? Probably not. But again, it probably wasn’t just Cambodia. Even though our boss at the NGO did have a saying about ” being Cambodified”- the place has a way of working on people to face their stuff and it does change people. I can definitely testify to this. So Tim and I had 13 months apart, a valuable time to work on ourselves and we were able to still navigate the slippery separated co-parenting roles without dirt flinging. Our boys were the true soldiers here- they banded together and built a friendship fort that is unbreakable. Probably out of necessity, they’ve shown an empathy and maturity beyond their years. And also learnt that life isn’t always tied up with pretty bows.
We were one of the lucky ones. We weathered the storm. But we continue to be mindful of how easily resentment can pile up between lovers until you can no longer see each other’s face. And that eerie place of disengagement- that slick gremlin that can go unnoticed while love silently walks out the door.
It takes some conscious presence this relationship thang.
If any of you are keen to follow my new writing project- I’m over at Less Stuff More Meaning, a wedding blog soon to be ethical gift registry, talking about…you may have guessed it…relationships.
Here is a link to my latest post: Let’s raise our glasses
I appreciated your support on our Cambodian adventure and even though it’s ended, this blog is likely to morph into something new. I’ll keep you updated. Hope you are all rollicking along happily, some times falling cos that’s how it is but even then there is always a view of the stars.
Big love, Amy